Guest Blog by Jessica of Elite Assistance
If caring feels heavier than it should, it’s time to reach out…
When January feels like it lasts 300 months, the pressure of caring for a loved one can start to feel more overwhelming than ever before. Dark mornings, relentless weather and daylight that never quite seems to appear can make everything feel harder.
Caring for a loved one is a responsibility no one really expects to take on. Yes, we all carry a quiet awareness that one day our parents or grandparents may need us in ways they never have before but the enormity of it often creeps up unnoticed. Responsibilities grow gradually and then suddenly, you realise you’re a fully fledged carer. You still have all the responsibilities you had before, yet you’ve taken on this full-time role you never asked for.
Of course, we step into these roles because caring for our loved ones is what feels natural. It’s what families have done for hundreds of years. And yet, it’s a subject that’s so rarely spoken about. Providing personal care for your parents, washing underwear and soiled sheets, reminding them to complete the most basic tasks and offering constant reassurance, often the most mentally exhausting part of all. It can take an enormous toll.
Over time, this can leave you burnt out. Feeling like you’re never doing enough, despite using every possible hour to hold your own life together. You are not alone. Nearly all of us have, or will, take on caring responsibilities at some point in our lives. Add feelings of resentment, irritability and self-neglect into the mix and even with family members sharing the load, it can become overwhelming.
Reaching out and admitting you need help is not failure. Yet asking for help often comes much later than it should; frequently after complete burnout. It’s a huge step, one that can bring feelings of guilt, shame and the fear that you’re letting down the person who needs you most. Allowing carers into your home to support a loved one can feel like a gargantuan leap. A stranger. Trusting someone else with deeply personal care.
We work with many families who are struggling to cope, who don’t always know what to do for the best and who often need more support than they feel able to admit. Care is an ‘underground’ world, one that few people speak openly about.
Elite Assistance carers are busy every day, quietly supporting families in your community, often without your knowledge. Working 365 days a year, at all hours. In all weathers and all conditions. Without hesitation. Providing welfare checks, live-in care, waking nights, and everything in between. Until you work in care, you never truly know just how many of these front doors, that you potentially pass everyday, has people behind them in desperate need of our help and support.
You don’t have to carry this alone.